On Stress

The only person you are destined to become
is the person you decide to be.

- Ralph Waldo Emerson

(1) Stress only exists in your head. So does your opinion of stress. If you view stress negatively, like it's a cancer weighing you down, then that stress will kill you like cancer. But if you CHOOSE to look at stress in a positive way, you will overcome the obstacle with grace and ease. So relax! Take everything one step at a time.

(2) Get some sleep. Find a way to calm your brain down when it's on your favorite pillow. Your brain recovers from the day during sleep, and if you don't find a way to "zen out" before drifting off, you leave yourself open to stressful dreams. If you are having a problem getting to sleep, might I recommend thinking of black.

(3) Personally, organizing stuff helps me de-stress. I have drawers and drawers of art supplies, all of them a mess, but every time I sit in front of it and take care of my things, I feel much better. And it never takes as long as I expect it to. It doesn't have to be art crap. You can organize your pantry, your clothes, under your sink, in that junk drawer... the possibilities are endless. And the sense of accomplishment after? ...priceless.

(4) Express yourself. Find someone who will listen to you. Our first instinct with negative feelings is to bury them. This breeds toxic compounds of emotions, weighing even heavier on whatever is stressing you out. Tis better to release the negative. Find someone to explain your struggles to. Start a journal. Use a friend, or your partner. Pets work too! The day my cat realized we were home alone and I was talking to him and only him, he started beaming with the joy of attention. I can say anything I want to that cat, because he only responds with absolute love and acceptance. And sometimes it's good to work things out verbally, especially if someone is there to love you while you're doing it.

Like all weak men he laid an exaggerated stress on not changing one's mind.
- W. Somerset Maugham

image by scott hassell

On Being Creative

Some people think that creativity is a bone or a tooth that you can be born without. I think those people are selling themselves short. I believe that intelligence is just another word for creativity, and vice versa. It just depends on where and how you apply it for it to fall into different categories of creativity.

I just recently discovered an awesome blog called Zen Habits, and found a great amount of insight on the matter to cultivating creativity. For the full blog, click HERE.

Here are the 6 steps that I began using, and find I’m using every day, not only in my work but especially in my relationships and my life outside of work These practices can be used to support the changing of habits and creating new habits. I’d suggest making the practice of creativity a habit that can support other habits. Here are some guidelines:

Believe in your creativity – This is the first practice and probably most important. You might begin by thinking about or writing down three creative things you’ve done – something you have written or said or completed. Notice an area in which you feel creative; perhaps cooking, drawing, fixing things, gardening. Creativity can show itself in lots of small ways, such as the gifts we give, or the clothes we wear, or how we set the table. Just begin noticing and recognizing your own creativity.

Know your voice of judgment – Everyone I’ve ever known has an inner judge. It can be difficult to accept that having an inner critic is part of the human condition. The good news is that this inner voice just wants to protect us and keep us safe, and that you don’t need to be stuck with or thrown by these inner voices. Knowing this, try relaxing your inner judge. Give it a name. Be playful. Experiment. Despite your judgments, you have the ability to be creative.

Pay attention to details – By entering into the practice of creativity, you can begin to notice more of the details of everyday life. By paying more attention to details, you can become more present; your world can become more alive. It is in this presence and aliveness that creativity takes place. When you put your shoes on, which shoe do you put on first? What’s the color of your front door? How many emails do you receive and send each day? Or play with giving things different names. Look at a paper clip or a strawberry, as though seeing them for the first time. What might you call them? These types of details and experiments can open doors to seeing the world differently.

Ask dumb questions – Our desire to look good and smart can get in the way of creativity. Instead, ask questions, especially those that may seem obvious, or even dumb. Risk looking awkward. Be curious about your feelings and your motivations. Let yourself wonder how things work and why you and others talk and act the way you do. Let go of the need to look good, and allow yourself to be curious and at times awkward. This is another door to creativity. There are no dumb questions.

Practice Mindfulness – Mindfulness is a fancy word for paying attention and for being in the present moment – not ruminating about the past, nor worrying about the future. Mindfulness is a simple and powerful practice. Of course, reviewing the past and preparing for the future are important. And, being creative, happens in this moment. The practice of mindfulness is to over and over notice when your mind is wandering and to bring your attention back to the present. In this way we build our capacity for presence, and for creativity. Mindfulness can also mean to allow your attention to open, to consciously not focus on any one thing. This space, of intentionally expanding your attention can be a creative process.

Embrace Paradox – It seems that nearly everything about being a human being is a paradox. In my own life, I’m an introvert and I enjoy speaking in front of groups; I can be indecisive and make decisions quickly; I’m confident and vulnerable. What are some of your paradoxes? Instead of ignoring or pushing these contradictions away, try acknowledging them, and embracing them. An example of a paradox I find myself embracing and practicing with is – fight for change and accept what is. These appear to be completely opposed, yet, the starting point for changing habits is to notice the habits that we actually have.